It's Monday morning and I'm facing (almost) 9 straight days of working 10am to 9pm. Boo-hoo I hear you hardworkers out there cry. Well when you normally work four leisurely hours a day this can be somewhat daunting! Anyway, the reason I'm putting myself through this is to secure a much-needed two week trip back to Australia starting May 24th.
I can't believe it's been almost a year already. Reading back through this blog has been more than just a little embarrassing but hey, I guess that's what the learning experience is all about.
My Japanese skills are far far below what I'd like them to be but I do feel somewhat confident as a longterm resident here to be able to deal with all but the most tricky of life's day-to-day tasks. I can watch a movie without subtitles and still follow the general idea of what's going on. I won't be laughing at many of the jokes though.
I've been a pretty shit son, an awful grandson, a terrible brother, a pretty lax friend and an overall pretty "shit bloke" to most people back in Australia. This trip will be somewhat of an attempt to rectify all of this (and perhaps make you feel somewhat less crushed when I return to Hiroshima again har har.)
Any specific requests for Japanese goods otherwise unattainable via the Internet, feel free to shoot me an email but please keep in mind that I don't really want to lug a suitcase of panties and "ninja shoes" through customs.
The blog has been dormant for a while now but the Flickr updates continue to happen so check them out if it tickles your fancy.
See you all in about 10 days!
Sunday, May 13, 2007
Sunday, March 25, 2007
Good PR or just insignificant?
Australia signed the Kyoto Protocol. Australia is one of the world's lowest polluters. Australia has no racism or problems due to ethnic tensions.
For these and many more striking fallacies just like them just talk to your average Hiroshima resident. It really is hard not to laugh when I hear people tell me I'm wrong when I tell them Australia is in the top 5 polluters (per capita) in the world. A quick googling tells me we're actually on the podium in 3rd at the moment, go team!
Is it because this is just an extension of the lack of interest in world affairs that I touched on in my previous missive here? Is it because Australia has a wonderful PR team spear-headed by that adorable little mascot, KOARA-kun? or is it because Australia really doesn't matter squat on the world stage?
I have met the occasional student that has been to Australia (and not just Cairns) and has read a newspaper or two and does know that Australia pollutes a lot for our size. When I ask them how this makes them feel and would they ever consider something like a consumer boycott of the ever-present "oojii beefu" (see http://www.aussiebeef.jp) in order to send their message to Australia? (I realise that may be a stupid idea, I didn't really think it through very hard, it just came up in discussion) The answer is always the standard Japanese noncommittal neutral position so as to avoid any possible chance of inharmonious discord (ie, debate).
Getting anyone to debate a real issue with any passion or sincerity at all is a complete nightmare. Sure, they're using a second language if they're debating with me and I definitely cut people slack for that. However even really high level students are quite difficult to engage in an argument. I have to be pretty careful at work not to get myself in a position where I could endanger my job (the amount of power the student has over the teacher in the world of English schools in Japan is ridiculous). The only time I really got a few students fired up was when I raised the issue of the Imperial family and whether Japan should rid themselves of that institution. I got a talking to quite soon after that about avoiding controversial topics while at work. Fair enough from a business perspective, the school exists to make a buck not facilitate debate and such; it's a business not an educational facility, that's for sure. Still, it's depressing all the same that ninety percent of the time the "free conversation room" swings around to "where do you like to go shopping?" rather than anything remotely interesting.
To round out this, yet again, poorly edited, directionless diatribe I shall return to the topic of Australia. It still is the land of sunshine, barbecues, koalas, kangaroos, "beach parties" and beer. At first I felt a few pangs of guilt when I told people a few of the nasty facts about Australia (after all, every country has its negatives) but I'm pretty much over it now. I don't deny or downplay the good but it's only fair Australia cop its fair share of the negativity that gets hurled at the USA when issues such as the environment or the Iraq war come up.
Oh by the way, thanks to all the budding editors out there who kindly emailed me to let me know about all the errors in my previous entry. I apologise again for the poor standard but I don't intend to change it and you've been given fair warning. Nice to know at least a few people are reading, though!
For these and many more striking fallacies just like them just talk to your average Hiroshima resident. It really is hard not to laugh when I hear people tell me I'm wrong when I tell them Australia is in the top 5 polluters (per capita) in the world. A quick googling tells me we're actually on the podium in 3rd at the moment, go team!
Is it because this is just an extension of the lack of interest in world affairs that I touched on in my previous missive here? Is it because Australia has a wonderful PR team spear-headed by that adorable little mascot, KOARA-kun? or is it because Australia really doesn't matter squat on the world stage?
I have met the occasional student that has been to Australia (and not just Cairns) and has read a newspaper or two and does know that Australia pollutes a lot for our size. When I ask them how this makes them feel and would they ever consider something like a consumer boycott of the ever-present "oojii beefu" (see http://www.aussiebeef.jp) in order to send their message to Australia? (I realise that may be a stupid idea, I didn't really think it through very hard, it just came up in discussion) The answer is always the standard Japanese noncommittal neutral position so as to avoid any possible chance of inharmonious discord (ie, debate).
Getting anyone to debate a real issue with any passion or sincerity at all is a complete nightmare. Sure, they're using a second language if they're debating with me and I definitely cut people slack for that. However even really high level students are quite difficult to engage in an argument. I have to be pretty careful at work not to get myself in a position where I could endanger my job (the amount of power the student has over the teacher in the world of English schools in Japan is ridiculous). The only time I really got a few students fired up was when I raised the issue of the Imperial family and whether Japan should rid themselves of that institution. I got a talking to quite soon after that about avoiding controversial topics while at work. Fair enough from a business perspective, the school exists to make a buck not facilitate debate and such; it's a business not an educational facility, that's for sure. Still, it's depressing all the same that ninety percent of the time the "free conversation room" swings around to "where do you like to go shopping?" rather than anything remotely interesting.
To round out this, yet again, poorly edited, directionless diatribe I shall return to the topic of Australia. It still is the land of sunshine, barbecues, koalas, kangaroos, "beach parties" and beer. At first I felt a few pangs of guilt when I told people a few of the nasty facts about Australia (after all, every country has its negatives) but I'm pretty much over it now. I don't deny or downplay the good but it's only fair Australia cop its fair share of the negativity that gets hurled at the USA when issues such as the environment or the Iraq war come up.
Oh by the way, thanks to all the budding editors out there who kindly emailed me to let me know about all the errors in my previous entry. I apologise again for the poor standard but I don't intend to change it and you've been given fair warning. Nice to know at least a few people are reading, though!
Sunday, March 18, 2007
I'm not dead, but I'm getting curmudgeonly
I'm sorry to have left this dormant for so long. I'm also sorry for returning on a negative note. I'm not sorry at all for what I have to say though.
I've been reading a hell of a lot recently. As you can no doubt imagine, works either focusing on or making use of the "ex-patriot condition" are of particular interest. One book especially has really gotten me thinking about Japan, my time here and how exactly my preconceptions of this country were just so misguided (as I suspect most of the cultural cliches and stereotypes about any nation are); Atomic Sushi by Simon May. It has one of the worst titles and cover illustrations I've ever seen but it really does beg the cliche about not judging them by those trappings alone.
I'll be trying to get my thoughts together on these topics more and more over the coming weeks. For now I'm just going to throw shit up randomly as I think of it. One reason I've resisted attempting anything like this for so long is that I really don't want to come across as some idiotic bigot who doesn't know humility from his elbow. I think there comes a time though where I have to at least begin to try to voice my thinkings on cultural matters and if, as is certainly possible, I look back on these writings in hindsight and fight them to be utterly cringeworthy and ignorant then so be it. I guess I can consider it part of maturing as an adult.
My bone to pick today is the lack of international news and general lack of international news awareness in Japan. This, like all of my observations are bound to be, is of course utterly anecdotal and lacking in any form of proper statistical analysis and control or any scientific method whatsoever. I don't watch a heap of TV, since at my current level of Japanese proficiency, I can only comprehend about 5% of it. However I do get exposed to a lot of it because Yuki watches it on and off throughout the day. I don't think I have ever seen a proper "current affairs" show once. Nothing remotely resembling Lateline or Dateline or The News Hour or anything like that. The newspapers carry some international stories but they hardly feature heavily.
Judging from general conversation with friends, students and the odd stranger, the average person's awareness (let alone opinion thereon) of world issues is staggeringly low. I know I'm not all that average in that I enjoy a huge variety of information sources afforded me by my laptop and extroadinarily fat Japanese internet tube. It just blows me away everytime I mention a news story in passing to some students, even one involving the Japanese Prime Minister, and get blank faces. Mr.Abe has recently done his best to fit both feet right in his mouth over comments relating to the "comfort girls" (a wonderful Japanese euphemism) during World War II. No chance of damaging his reputation with the average Hiroshima resident though. Nobody I mentioned it to had heard about the matter.
I have to stop now as I've just realised its time to get on my bike and head to work. I feel so old and bitter and pathetic having written the above, but I guess there comes a time for any ex-pat when they feel they have to shake off the extremely humble feelings of being a guest in another people's nation and realise they are a part of the fabric of this nation now and entitled at least somewhat to a critical opinion. I'm sure this is a nightmare to read and I don't have time to proof it even once but rest assured there's plenty more to come. Oh goody!
I've been reading a hell of a lot recently. As you can no doubt imagine, works either focusing on or making use of the "ex-patriot condition" are of particular interest. One book especially has really gotten me thinking about Japan, my time here and how exactly my preconceptions of this country were just so misguided (as I suspect most of the cultural cliches and stereotypes about any nation are); Atomic Sushi by Simon May. It has one of the worst titles and cover illustrations I've ever seen but it really does beg the cliche about not judging them by those trappings alone.
I'll be trying to get my thoughts together on these topics more and more over the coming weeks. For now I'm just going to throw shit up randomly as I think of it. One reason I've resisted attempting anything like this for so long is that I really don't want to come across as some idiotic bigot who doesn't know humility from his elbow. I think there comes a time though where I have to at least begin to try to voice my thinkings on cultural matters and if, as is certainly possible, I look back on these writings in hindsight and fight them to be utterly cringeworthy and ignorant then so be it. I guess I can consider it part of maturing as an adult.
My bone to pick today is the lack of international news and general lack of international news awareness in Japan. This, like all of my observations are bound to be, is of course utterly anecdotal and lacking in any form of proper statistical analysis and control or any scientific method whatsoever. I don't watch a heap of TV, since at my current level of Japanese proficiency, I can only comprehend about 5% of it. However I do get exposed to a lot of it because Yuki watches it on and off throughout the day. I don't think I have ever seen a proper "current affairs" show once. Nothing remotely resembling Lateline or Dateline or The News Hour or anything like that. The newspapers carry some international stories but they hardly feature heavily.
Judging from general conversation with friends, students and the odd stranger, the average person's awareness (let alone opinion thereon) of world issues is staggeringly low. I know I'm not all that average in that I enjoy a huge variety of information sources afforded me by my laptop and extroadinarily fat Japanese internet tube. It just blows me away everytime I mention a news story in passing to some students, even one involving the Japanese Prime Minister, and get blank faces. Mr.Abe has recently done his best to fit both feet right in his mouth over comments relating to the "comfort girls" (a wonderful Japanese euphemism) during World War II. No chance of damaging his reputation with the average Hiroshima resident though. Nobody I mentioned it to had heard about the matter.
I have to stop now as I've just realised its time to get on my bike and head to work. I feel so old and bitter and pathetic having written the above, but I guess there comes a time for any ex-pat when they feel they have to shake off the extremely humble feelings of being a guest in another people's nation and realise they are a part of the fabric of this nation now and entitled at least somewhat to a critical opinion. I'm sure this is a nightmare to read and I don't have time to proof it even once but rest assured there's plenty more to come. Oh goody!
Wednesday, February 21, 2007
KANCHO!
Yes. I finally got kancho'ed.
(I have no idea how you conjugate a verb like that)
For all of you who have no idea what I'm talking about, check the wikipedia page for Kancho before reading further.
My home branch here in Hiroshima is a bit unusual in that it doesn't offer kid classes. This means that most of the staff there are those who have specifically requested to not have to teach kids. I was just put there by chance but I wasn't really complaining. It's not that I fear teaching kids or worry that I'm bad at it but I just prefer talking with adults. Some of the high school kids can be alright but so many of them spend 90% of the lesson staring at the table.
A few months ago things changed a little. One day of my schedule was changed so that I would be trekking out to a kids-only branch to teach a bunch of kids classes back to back. Talk about jumping in the deep end. I can't imagine how difficult it would be for someone who'd never had siblings or younger cousins. I still found it pretty intimidating, trying to control a class of kids between the age of 3 and 12 while trying to impart a little English as well. Thank heavens I've had a bit of experience looking after my cousins and baby-sitting. I still think I'm dangerously unqualified to be teaching kids but oh well.
It's certainly taught me a lot of interesting Japanese (which I mentioned in an earlier entry on this blog). In fact that's one of the things I enjoy most about teaching kids. Listening to them chatter away to each other in Japanese. As soon as there is any silence one of the kids will pipe up, it's impossible to keep them quiet unless I'm doing something to distract them. Of course most of the kids assume that foreigners can't speak or understand any Japanese. I've had kids say, upon meeting me for the first time, "wow, you have a strange face" or "why are you so hairy?" in Japanese. It doesn't offend me at all, in fact I love the honesty and relish the chance to learn new vocab (even if it is childish vocab). That sort of honesty is something that is almost impossible to find amongst adults in Japan (huge generalisation I know, so take it with a cup of salt). I'm not saying I really really miss random idiots on Brunswick St telling me to get fucked or they'll happily put their fist in my face, but the odd insult certainly does make you all the more aware of how polite Japanese society is (on the surface at least.)
So onto the juicy details.
It was a kinder class (kids 3-6 years old) and we were part way through singing "Heads, shoulders, knees and toes" (a big hit with these kids since it has easy actions and vocab that they are somewhat familiar with) when I realised I had lost visual contact with the trickiest little girl in the class. I always wondered why she tried to get around behind me. I've known about Kancho for a long time but once I arrived in Japan I somehow forgot all about it. I thought she was just sick of my face and wanted to hide. No, no. She wanted to bury her fingers up sensei's pooper. Luckily for me my suit pants that day were nice, thick, strong, woolen ones. Every other kid in the class saw my facial expression and knew what had happened. They burst into hysterics while I spun around to face my conqueror. She had one of the most evil grins I've ever seen on a little girl. Still clutching her fingers in the telltale Kancho style she backed away from me cackling all the while. I floundered for a moment, not having the faintest idea how to deal with this situation.
Without thinking too hard about the potential consequences I snapped at her and blurted out "DON'T DO THINGS LIKE THAT!" in Japanese which brought a thunderous silence to the room. Amazing how quickly you get some respect when you demonstrate that you can say the same things that Mum and Dad can say. The little girl was stunned for a moment but quickly gained her composure. Much to my surprise she did not resume her usual cheeky, obstinate behaviour but instead bowed a little and gave me a short, obedient "hai".
My schedule is back to normal now so I'm not teaching any kids. I do miss them occasionally but I'll be glad if I can go the rest of my time in Japan without having my anus violated.
(I have no idea how you conjugate a verb like that)
For all of you who have no idea what I'm talking about, check the wikipedia page for Kancho before reading further.
My home branch here in Hiroshima is a bit unusual in that it doesn't offer kid classes. This means that most of the staff there are those who have specifically requested to not have to teach kids. I was just put there by chance but I wasn't really complaining. It's not that I fear teaching kids or worry that I'm bad at it but I just prefer talking with adults. Some of the high school kids can be alright but so many of them spend 90% of the lesson staring at the table.
A few months ago things changed a little. One day of my schedule was changed so that I would be trekking out to a kids-only branch to teach a bunch of kids classes back to back. Talk about jumping in the deep end. I can't imagine how difficult it would be for someone who'd never had siblings or younger cousins. I still found it pretty intimidating, trying to control a class of kids between the age of 3 and 12 while trying to impart a little English as well. Thank heavens I've had a bit of experience looking after my cousins and baby-sitting. I still think I'm dangerously unqualified to be teaching kids but oh well.
It's certainly taught me a lot of interesting Japanese (which I mentioned in an earlier entry on this blog). In fact that's one of the things I enjoy most about teaching kids. Listening to them chatter away to each other in Japanese. As soon as there is any silence one of the kids will pipe up, it's impossible to keep them quiet unless I'm doing something to distract them. Of course most of the kids assume that foreigners can't speak or understand any Japanese. I've had kids say, upon meeting me for the first time, "wow, you have a strange face" or "why are you so hairy?" in Japanese. It doesn't offend me at all, in fact I love the honesty and relish the chance to learn new vocab (even if it is childish vocab). That sort of honesty is something that is almost impossible to find amongst adults in Japan (huge generalisation I know, so take it with a cup of salt). I'm not saying I really really miss random idiots on Brunswick St telling me to get fucked or they'll happily put their fist in my face, but the odd insult certainly does make you all the more aware of how polite Japanese society is (on the surface at least.)
So onto the juicy details.
It was a kinder class (kids 3-6 years old) and we were part way through singing "Heads, shoulders, knees and toes" (a big hit with these kids since it has easy actions and vocab that they are somewhat familiar with) when I realised I had lost visual contact with the trickiest little girl in the class. I always wondered why she tried to get around behind me. I've known about Kancho for a long time but once I arrived in Japan I somehow forgot all about it. I thought she was just sick of my face and wanted to hide. No, no. She wanted to bury her fingers up sensei's pooper. Luckily for me my suit pants that day were nice, thick, strong, woolen ones. Every other kid in the class saw my facial expression and knew what had happened. They burst into hysterics while I spun around to face my conqueror. She had one of the most evil grins I've ever seen on a little girl. Still clutching her fingers in the telltale Kancho style she backed away from me cackling all the while. I floundered for a moment, not having the faintest idea how to deal with this situation.
Without thinking too hard about the potential consequences I snapped at her and blurted out "DON'T DO THINGS LIKE THAT!" in Japanese which brought a thunderous silence to the room. Amazing how quickly you get some respect when you demonstrate that you can say the same things that Mum and Dad can say. The little girl was stunned for a moment but quickly gained her composure. Much to my surprise she did not resume her usual cheeky, obstinate behaviour but instead bowed a little and gave me a short, obedient "hai".
My schedule is back to normal now so I'm not teaching any kids. I do miss them occasionally but I'll be glad if I can go the rest of my time in Japan without having my anus violated.
Monday, February 05, 2007
...it makes my dookie twinkle!
I have finally consumed that which most of you would probably call a waste of cash. To you I say, what trip to Japan would be complete without eating beef worth more per kilo than many people spend in an entire week on food?!
My preparation for these little updates usually involves whatever shit flies around my head on the streetcar ride home. It was tonight that I was trying to recall my most expensive meal ever and I think the title still rests with a large family meal at France Soir (fixed the name. ed.) in Toorak. I don't recall them ever having steak that cost as much as the stuff I ate here the other day though.
It was a completely ordinary Tuesday night in Hiroshima. I was hanging out at Yuki's place in one of Hiroshima's frosty suburbs just watching a man with a fish-eye lens camera ride a rhino around a field while taking photos and trying not to fall off (very tame by TV standards over here). Yuki was cooking (she cooks at her place, I at mine... for the most part) yakisoba (click the link if you don't know it) but she surprised me with an entree first. It was very thinly sliced beef, fried in a dark brown sauce. Beef really isn't a regular item on many people's menus in Japan (or at least those on a teacher's salary) so I got stuck into eagerly. It was amazingly soft, fatty and scrumptious. In fact it was so good that the regular old yakisoba struggled to entice once the beef was gone.
I almost didn't check but since it was my job to take out the trash I figured I'd pass a cursory glance over the beef package's sticker. 3000 yen (34AUD), I noticed... "shiiiiet!" I thought, I'd better make sure the next meal I make for Yuki is more than crappy chicken curry. Then I noticed the weight of the beef that now lay in my belly. 280 grams. "SHIIIIIEEEET!" Yes a quick little calculation will tell you that the beef cost more than 110AUD per kilo.
I'm really glad I only found out after the meal or the psychosomatic price-value effect may have interfered with my judgement. I can safely say the beef was good but it definitely isn't $110/kg good!
Oh, for all of you who don't have any idea what the title of this post is all about, apologies... I'm in a stupid mood and I've been drinking Dr.Pepper with vodka...
My preparation for these little updates usually involves whatever shit flies around my head on the streetcar ride home. It was tonight that I was trying to recall my most expensive meal ever and I think the title still rests with a large family meal at France Soir (fixed the name. ed.) in Toorak. I don't recall them ever having steak that cost as much as the stuff I ate here the other day though.
It was a completely ordinary Tuesday night in Hiroshima. I was hanging out at Yuki's place in one of Hiroshima's frosty suburbs just watching a man with a fish-eye lens camera ride a rhino around a field while taking photos and trying not to fall off (very tame by TV standards over here). Yuki was cooking (she cooks at her place, I at mine... for the most part) yakisoba (click the link if you don't know it) but she surprised me with an entree first. It was very thinly sliced beef, fried in a dark brown sauce. Beef really isn't a regular item on many people's menus in Japan (or at least those on a teacher's salary) so I got stuck into eagerly. It was amazingly soft, fatty and scrumptious. In fact it was so good that the regular old yakisoba struggled to entice once the beef was gone.
I almost didn't check but since it was my job to take out the trash I figured I'd pass a cursory glance over the beef package's sticker. 3000 yen (34AUD), I noticed... "shiiiiet!" I thought, I'd better make sure the next meal I make for Yuki is more than crappy chicken curry. Then I noticed the weight of the beef that now lay in my belly. 280 grams. "SHIIIIIEEEET!" Yes a quick little calculation will tell you that the beef cost more than 110AUD per kilo.
I'm really glad I only found out after the meal or the psychosomatic price-value effect may have interfered with my judgement. I can safely say the beef was good but it definitely isn't $110/kg good!
Oh, for all of you who don't have any idea what the title of this post is all about, apologies... I'm in a stupid mood and I've been drinking Dr.Pepper with vodka...
Monday, January 29, 2007
カラオケ or how I learnt to stop worrying and love the song!
It took me a while, but I finally got my photos from my trip to the Kansai region of Japan over the New Year break up onto Flickr. Have a look and leave a comment if you'd like. For the first time ever I'm actually pretty proud of a few of my photos. If anyone wanted to see the most impressive parts of Japan in less than a week I would definitely recommend the Kansai region (Kyoto, Osaka, Kobe, etc...). I know I haven't exactly seen the entire country but of the places I have been Kansai really blew me away.
Now onto the main topic for tonight's little update. In case you were wondering, those four characters up there say "KA-RA-O-KE" and yes, oh how the mighty have fallen. Don't worry too much, I haven't started buying SMAP albums (don't google that if you don't know them, just be glad of that fact) or enjoying J-pop or anything crazy like that. However, I have finally learnt just how a mainstream-pop-hater such as myself can enjoy karaoke.
Karaoke is everywhere in Japan (or at least everywhere I've been). There are massive multi-level buildings with many booths decked out with big flat televisions, stereos, microphones and seedy couches. They're almost always busy, whether its school children, young professionals or older people wanting to impress each other away with some slow Japanese ballads. One of the most insane things about karaoke is definitely the cost. From what I've seen the going rate seems to be about 8AUD per person per hour. Lots of the huge commercial places have insane amounts of rules too, such as no drinking (BYE!) and no huffing drugs out of paper bags (yes, they even have hilarious cartoon images to accompany that one, sorry but I couldn't get a photo).
It wasn't until a friend of mine managed to direct a big drunk group of us into a little bar he knew of with a great bar and an even greater karaoke setup that I was finally able to understand what all the fuss was about. Unlike the usual setup which involves private rooms of about 4-6 people singing to each other, this bar had the karaoke setup out in front of everyone. The size of our group and the lack of other customers on that particular night meant that we were able to dominate the machine for a good many hours. At this point I was still highly skeptical and was much more interested in getting a few good glasses of beer in front of me. It wasn't until I realised that this karaoke machine possessed a much much much more impressive collection of English language songs than the usual Japanese karaoke machine.
Quick side note, if you ever wondered where the copyright holders of the music of Billy Joel, BoyzIImen, Bon Jovi, Brian Adams (that's enough and we're still in the B's) were getting all their fat sacks of royalty money from, wonder no more. It is the karaoke bars of Japan! (and probably many other parts of Asia too). The average karaoke joint's collection of English songs really is the worst of the worst of the worst of pop music of the past 30 years with a heavy bias for the late 80s and early 90s.
Anyway, back to "G's Bar" where we were before. I was getting all prepared to down as much beer as quickly as I could until I could safely sit through a Bon Jovi track without wanting to rip my own head off when I heard the beginning thumps and bumping baseline of Another One Bites the Dust. (This song holds a special place in my memory due to its prevalence at baseball games that my old man used to take me to in my much younger days)
There it was, my karaoke yellow-brick road stretching out before me and Freddie was right there ready to take me by the hand. Queen. That's all I need now for any karaoke excursion to put me on a fantastic high (accompanied on "the rocks" by Mr.Osake). Seriously, all the shit, horrible, tragic music that makes it onto the pages of karaoke books only to be discovered by delirious morons who will happily tell you that Bon Jovi really was the world's greatest song writer can just fuck off and keep doing their thing far far away from me. Over here in this corner, we have Bohemian Rhapsody, Another One Bites the Dust and Bicycle Race and I defy any person with a musical bone in their body to resist their allure!
For even better karaoke adventures all you need to do is invite your Japanese friends along. I still think Japanese sounds worse than English when sung but when you walk in a karaoke joint you've already thrown the rule book out the window and pissed on it. My Japanese sucks (still... maybe forever) and I can't read enough kanji when I'm drunk to really sing along properly but I never stop enjoying watching my Japanese friends belt out some oldschool Japanese songs. I've got one verse of one Japanese song down pat now so I'm able to join in albeit a fleeting cameo, it's just a pity that it's a power-pop song for a female voice. No worries mate, the falsetto loves the workout.
I would still much rather have the access to fantastic live music that a city like Melbourne affords but there is no way I'm leaving Japan any time soon so while I'm here I'm going to learn to make the best of the poor music situation. So, grab a nice big fat stack of 1000 yen notes and join me in the sake-soaked seedy leather couch and belt out a good hard verse of Bicycle...
you say black
I say white!
Now onto the main topic for tonight's little update. In case you were wondering, those four characters up there say "KA-RA-O-KE" and yes, oh how the mighty have fallen. Don't worry too much, I haven't started buying SMAP albums (don't google that if you don't know them, just be glad of that fact) or enjoying J-pop or anything crazy like that. However, I have finally learnt just how a mainstream-pop-hater such as myself can enjoy karaoke.
Karaoke is everywhere in Japan (or at least everywhere I've been). There are massive multi-level buildings with many booths decked out with big flat televisions, stereos, microphones and seedy couches. They're almost always busy, whether its school children, young professionals or older people wanting to impress each other away with some slow Japanese ballads. One of the most insane things about karaoke is definitely the cost. From what I've seen the going rate seems to be about 8AUD per person per hour. Lots of the huge commercial places have insane amounts of rules too, such as no drinking (BYE!) and no huffing drugs out of paper bags (yes, they even have hilarious cartoon images to accompany that one, sorry but I couldn't get a photo).
It wasn't until a friend of mine managed to direct a big drunk group of us into a little bar he knew of with a great bar and an even greater karaoke setup that I was finally able to understand what all the fuss was about. Unlike the usual setup which involves private rooms of about 4-6 people singing to each other, this bar had the karaoke setup out in front of everyone. The size of our group and the lack of other customers on that particular night meant that we were able to dominate the machine for a good many hours. At this point I was still highly skeptical and was much more interested in getting a few good glasses of beer in front of me. It wasn't until I realised that this karaoke machine possessed a much much much more impressive collection of English language songs than the usual Japanese karaoke machine.
Quick side note, if you ever wondered where the copyright holders of the music of Billy Joel, BoyzIImen, Bon Jovi, Brian Adams (that's enough and we're still in the B's) were getting all their fat sacks of royalty money from, wonder no more. It is the karaoke bars of Japan! (and probably many other parts of Asia too). The average karaoke joint's collection of English songs really is the worst of the worst of the worst of pop music of the past 30 years with a heavy bias for the late 80s and early 90s.
Anyway, back to "G's Bar" where we were before. I was getting all prepared to down as much beer as quickly as I could until I could safely sit through a Bon Jovi track without wanting to rip my own head off when I heard the beginning thumps and bumping baseline of Another One Bites the Dust. (This song holds a special place in my memory due to its prevalence at baseball games that my old man used to take me to in my much younger days)
There it was, my karaoke yellow-brick road stretching out before me and Freddie was right there ready to take me by the hand. Queen. That's all I need now for any karaoke excursion to put me on a fantastic high (accompanied on "the rocks" by Mr.Osake). Seriously, all the shit, horrible, tragic music that makes it onto the pages of karaoke books only to be discovered by delirious morons who will happily tell you that Bon Jovi really was the world's greatest song writer can just fuck off and keep doing their thing far far away from me. Over here in this corner, we have Bohemian Rhapsody, Another One Bites the Dust and Bicycle Race and I defy any person with a musical bone in their body to resist their allure!
For even better karaoke adventures all you need to do is invite your Japanese friends along. I still think Japanese sounds worse than English when sung but when you walk in a karaoke joint you've already thrown the rule book out the window and pissed on it. My Japanese sucks (still... maybe forever) and I can't read enough kanji when I'm drunk to really sing along properly but I never stop enjoying watching my Japanese friends belt out some oldschool Japanese songs. I've got one verse of one Japanese song down pat now so I'm able to join in albeit a fleeting cameo, it's just a pity that it's a power-pop song for a female voice. No worries mate, the falsetto loves the workout.
I would still much rather have the access to fantastic live music that a city like Melbourne affords but there is no way I'm leaving Japan any time soon so while I'm here I'm going to learn to make the best of the poor music situation. So, grab a nice big fat stack of 1000 yen notes and join me in the sake-soaked seedy leather couch and belt out a good hard verse of Bicycle...
you say black
I say white!
Thursday, January 18, 2007
Quick apologies... if anyone cares
Judging from the number of responses I received (less than 10) there aren't many of you out there who care much about being able to view my private photos. But in case you are wondering, no I haven't uploaded any photos at all since November. Sorry, but I made the switch from iPhoto to Aperture recently. While Aperture is an amazing program, it has a relatively steep learning curve so I am still unable to export my photos to Flickr. I'll rectify this as soon as possible.
Some people have told me they are unable to see the link to Flickr on the right hand side. I have no idea why this is happening but I care so very little about programming and code in general that I'm not going to try to fix the problem. Suffice to say you can use this link here and then bookmark it.
Again, if you want to see my private photos now you will have to sign up for a Flickr account and then message me with your Flickr account so I can give you permission. I know making yet another account on the internet just to view some idiot's photos is a pain, but I personally reckon Flickr (not to mention people's privacy) is worth the hassle.
When I do get around to uploading some photos I will let you know here.
Some people have told me they are unable to see the link to Flickr on the right hand side. I have no idea why this is happening but I care so very little about programming and code in general that I'm not going to try to fix the problem. Suffice to say you can use this link here and then bookmark it.
Again, if you want to see my private photos now you will have to sign up for a Flickr account and then message me with your Flickr account so I can give you permission. I know making yet another account on the internet just to view some idiot's photos is a pain, but I personally reckon Flickr (not to mention people's privacy) is worth the hassle.
When I do get around to uploading some photos I will let you know here.
LOVE CHRISTMAS!
Things have settled down now post-New Year holiday and all that. I've finally returned to soccer after 4 months or so sidelined with my stupid ankle injury. I played a great return match scoring two goals but perhaps more enjoyable was the fact that my Japanese skills have improved so noticeably that my team mates commented. I still feel like I would put myself in the "cannot speak Japanese" basket largely because my ability to construct sentences is still hopeless. However my listening and reading and writing skills have improved drastically so while I might not be able to answer many questions correctly, I can follow a conversation so long as the topic stays away from existentialism or economic theory.
I want to return to my previous style of relatively short entries on interesting topics, so in that vain here comes a piece on Christmas, Japanese style. I know it's late and it would have been much more interesting and relevant pre-December 25th but oh well.
I'm sure 99% of you are aware that Japan is not a Christian nation. Hence Christmas is wonderfully free from any Christian ties (if they even exist in Australia anymore). It is a perfectly capitalist event now with the almighty dollar (or yen) the only god. Japanese Christmas in a nutshell is more like Valentine's Day with a splash of a strange Santa/reindeer motif. Here are a few pictures I found on Google that might explain it better than my words can.
That there is a bentou (lunchbox) in Christmas style.
Christmas is so unimportant here that it isn't even a public holiday. The most important part of the entire affair is Christmas Eve when couples get together for romantic dinners and walks around town admiring the insanely tasteless Christmas light displays. If you've ever wondered what cherubs, love hearts, mermaids, dolphins, and trains have to do with Christmas, come to Hiroshima next Christmas and take a walk down Peace Boulevard where you will be able to see all the aforementioned and much more in twinkling light displays up to 30m tall.
Another crucial part of Japanese Christmas is the Christmas cake. Ahh, something in common with our own you're thinking. No such luck I'm afraid. This is Japanese Christmas cake.
I'm not sure if you can read the price tags there but they seem to start at around 2,500 yen (-AUD27) for the tiny ones. I got to sample a few and I must say they are entirely unimpressive and bland. Plain sponge cake with generic icing, whipped cream and strawberries on top. There are fantastic cakes available in Japan (especially in Kobe) but the Christmas cake ain't a great example.
Quite a number of my students were generally surprised to learn of the difference between an Australian Christmas and their own. They were particularly shocked to learn that we don't eat Christmas cake anything like the monsters pictured above. The fact that in Australia, one of the only times of the year I eat oysters (at least regularly) is on Christmas day seemed to amuse them.
Being away from Australia and all my family and friends at Christmas made me realise a few things (close window now if you want to avoid personal waffle now). Being an atheist, Christmas has nill religious significance for me but that doesn't mean that I can't or don't enjoy some of the religious music of the season. Furthermore I do think Christmas in Australia is a really nice vehicle for family and friends to get together and have a jolly good time. Christmas changed a lot for me when I moved out of home and being absent from my family Christmas(es - one perk of separated parents is the dual Christmas) definitely made me long for the sight of a table covered in delicious treats and the satisfied post-meal relaxation on the couch. The holiday has clearly been savagely beaten by capitalism and if people want to agree to shift the date for their own family get-together to another time that doesn't coincide with inflated prices and massive crowds then go for it. In one regard this is why I envy the Canadians with their Thanksgiving. From what my new Canadian friends tell me, it seems to be the same family-oriented festival of food but without the tacky trappings of Christmas.
Oh, the title of this post "LOVE CHRISTMAS" comes courtesy of the enormous light display on the biggest department store in Hiroshima. I don't think they mean it so sound like an imperative but that's how it sounded to me since it was positioned above the masses of cashed-up shoppers flowing in and out of the department store.
I want to return to my previous style of relatively short entries on interesting topics, so in that vain here comes a piece on Christmas, Japanese style. I know it's late and it would have been much more interesting and relevant pre-December 25th but oh well.
I'm sure 99% of you are aware that Japan is not a Christian nation. Hence Christmas is wonderfully free from any Christian ties (if they even exist in Australia anymore). It is a perfectly capitalist event now with the almighty dollar (or yen) the only god. Japanese Christmas in a nutshell is more like Valentine's Day with a splash of a strange Santa/reindeer motif. Here are a few pictures I found on Google that might explain it better than my words can.
That there is a bentou (lunchbox) in Christmas style.
Christmas is so unimportant here that it isn't even a public holiday. The most important part of the entire affair is Christmas Eve when couples get together for romantic dinners and walks around town admiring the insanely tasteless Christmas light displays. If you've ever wondered what cherubs, love hearts, mermaids, dolphins, and trains have to do with Christmas, come to Hiroshima next Christmas and take a walk down Peace Boulevard where you will be able to see all the aforementioned and much more in twinkling light displays up to 30m tall.
Another crucial part of Japanese Christmas is the Christmas cake. Ahh, something in common with our own you're thinking. No such luck I'm afraid. This is Japanese Christmas cake.
I'm not sure if you can read the price tags there but they seem to start at around 2,500 yen (-AUD27) for the tiny ones. I got to sample a few and I must say they are entirely unimpressive and bland. Plain sponge cake with generic icing, whipped cream and strawberries on top. There are fantastic cakes available in Japan (especially in Kobe) but the Christmas cake ain't a great example.
Quite a number of my students were generally surprised to learn of the difference between an Australian Christmas and their own. They were particularly shocked to learn that we don't eat Christmas cake anything like the monsters pictured above. The fact that in Australia, one of the only times of the year I eat oysters (at least regularly) is on Christmas day seemed to amuse them.
Being away from Australia and all my family and friends at Christmas made me realise a few things (close window now if you want to avoid personal waffle now). Being an atheist, Christmas has nill religious significance for me but that doesn't mean that I can't or don't enjoy some of the religious music of the season. Furthermore I do think Christmas in Australia is a really nice vehicle for family and friends to get together and have a jolly good time. Christmas changed a lot for me when I moved out of home and being absent from my family Christmas(es - one perk of separated parents is the dual Christmas) definitely made me long for the sight of a table covered in delicious treats and the satisfied post-meal relaxation on the couch. The holiday has clearly been savagely beaten by capitalism and if people want to agree to shift the date for their own family get-together to another time that doesn't coincide with inflated prices and massive crowds then go for it. In one regard this is why I envy the Canadians with their Thanksgiving. From what my new Canadian friends tell me, it seems to be the same family-oriented festival of food but without the tacky trappings of Christmas.
Oh, the title of this post "LOVE CHRISTMAS" comes courtesy of the enormous light display on the biggest department store in Hiroshima. I don't think they mean it so sound like an imperative but that's how it sounded to me since it was positioned above the masses of cashed-up shoppers flowing in and out of the department store.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
